sculpted | MISSION 004 [SOUTHERN ROUTE 35

MISSION 004 [SOUTHERN ROUTE 35 - ACTION/VIDEO]

[[GOOD MORNING, JOHTO! Should you be watching your video feed this fine day, or in the vicinity of the outskirts of Goldenrod City, you'll soon catch sight of Alex Louis Armstrong posing dramatically in front of the camera, shirtless. Of course.]]

I have a marvel for you all today! My beautiful Stein has evolved into his final form!

[[And suddenly, popping up in front of the camera is....

....a swan in a purple bra. A sparkly purple bra.]]

Witness the way the sunlight catches his glossy feathers! The way the light sparkles across his wings! Have you ever seen such a magnificent sight, Johto?!

[[As Armstrong speaks, the Swanna goes through a series of triumphant poses. And if one looks closely, they might even see some....pink sparkles near his eyes? Could he have learned the art of the Armstrong sparkle, passed down in the Major's family for generations?]]

My Pokemon are now all in their final forms! And so I pose this question to you, noble viewers; what Gyms do you recommend we take on? We have been training our bodies firmly and dutifully in preparation for this day!

[[And behind him, Armstrong's team of Pokemon sit quietly, mostly looking amused at his display. Some look annoyed, but more at the Swanna's posing rather than their trainer.]]

Alternatively, should you wish to come and marvel at the sight that is the magnificent and beautiful Stein the Swanna, I welcome you all with open arms!

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[WHAT

THE HELL

HAS HE JUST WITNESSED

.................BECAUSE IT WAS FABULOUS

holy hell you are actively getting applause from over here]

Very impressive, my good man - while the subject of your exuberance is admittedly an unusual one, that was quite the display.

[...OH GOD IT'S ARMSTRONG]

[IS IT TOO LATE TO TURN AND RUN]

[...SHIT IT'S TOTALLY TOO LATE ISN'T IT. OH GOD WHAT DOES HE DO.]

[...other than stand there and weep internally, that is.]

[Ryuunosuke has received orders from Cobra to obtain information on the PGC's Pokémon. He doesn't know who is actually in this anti-Rocket organization, but he does have a list of names that was sent out.]

[...None of that matters at the moment though - Ryuunosuke is too busy staring in awe at the sparkling swan.]

Whoa...! What kind of Pokémon is that?

[Hi Armstrong, have a sparkley-eyed brat!]

[.....MOTHER OF GOD

it's a very rare occasion that Clive is genuinely impressed by people, but holy shit, color him motherfucking impressed right now

not just by the bird, either; his entire team looks pretty fucking awesome, and those muscles

~~he has finally found true love~~]

Very impressive, sir! I've never seen such a splendid sight!

Uh...Did you really have to put this on for the entire network?

[Why, no, he doesn't know why he's asking. Why do you ask?]

[OH GOOD LORD]

[EVERY TIME HE TRIES TO LEAVE THE CITY SOMETHING HAPPENS]

Arm...strong...?

[HIS WHOLE BRAIN IS CRYING OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAN]

[YOU CAN'T EVEN BLAME THIS ON THE HAPPYBEAMS THIS TIME!!!]

Edited 2012-05-01 00:50 (UTC)

[ Just, have this look. Forever.

... He doesn't care about your Pokemon being in their final forms or whatever. Can he just eat one? ]

[THIS WAS NOT WHAT ENVY WAS EXPECTING TO SEE TODAY.

...Maybe he can just. Turn around and escape before he's noticed.]

[Too bad for Envy he's got his Houndoom along with him today, and said Houndoom has caught sight of this new person and new pokemon and there are things sparkling and he must investigate. So Armstrong will have a sunglasses-wearing hellhound letting out a bark of greeting and trotting on up to him, tail wagging and looking oh so excited to meet everyone.]

...

[Armstrong. ARMSTRONG.

WHY DO YOU OWN A SASSY GAY SWAN?]

...

Edited 2012-05-01 02:00 (UTC)

That swan is no where near as pretty as me.

[Johnny is also shirtless. And posing.]

Prettyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!

[Just... hopelessly confused right now.]

...It looks very nice?

[What is it with this guy and loosing the shirts? Why does Mr. Hughes know such weird people?]

It's a very pretty evolution.

Edited 2012-05-01 03:32 (UTC)

[ Yeah. He can't see her tattoo either. There will be no chesticle staring this conversation!

The feed clicks on to show Lust some distance away. A Sneasel clings into her shoulder and looks at the feed distrustingly. A swinub, can be seen by her foot as she carries a new egg. Cubchoo, or Armstrong, remains in the background sneezing up snot puddles. A Hoppip can be seen passing after a brief tangle in Lust's hair that's resolved just seconds before the feed turns on.

Of course, that's not all the pokemon she has on her. A shiny Smoochum blows kisses towards the feed as its standard greeting. And Lickitung and Munchlax are eating out of a dumpster. Whatever. These aren't her pokemon. She don't care. She gets paid whether they're in dire need of pepto bismol or not.

ENOUGH WITH THE BORING DESCRIPTIONS. HERE WE GO. TALKING TIME. Lust's voice is courteous and polite. ]

Hello, Major Armstrong. It's pleasant to see you again. It's been a while. [ And now onto her question. She looks a bit beside herself. ] However, I have to question what's going on in this feed. Is your pokemon wearing a brasserie? [ GIVES A WHOLE NEW MEANING TO THE TERM WONDER BRA. ]

[

yeah man he is so glad Tohsaka is here right now, if this was the only other magical-ish aristocrat around then

god

daaaaamn]

How... very interesting.

[where is your shirt.]

[...oh for the love of--

WHAT IS HE WATCHING

GOD

Okay give him a moment so he can stop gawking, close his mouth and clear his throat before speaking. Because yes. Gyms and stuff.]

With the guys you've got back there? You shouldn't have problems beating most of 'em! Fire-type's good for both Azalea and Mahogany's leaders, Fighting will get ya the badge in Goldenrod and with two Flying-types, beating Chuck in Cianwood will be a piece of cake! ... You might wanna challenge Falkner, too, since you've got Rock and Electric over there, right? [He says that last one rather reluctantly, considering how it's basically admitting Flying-types have flaws... but uh, can't really hide that.]

... He looks pretty cool. Stein, that is. [~~he wants one~~]

... The heck is your bird wearing?

[Larry has no comment on anything else. Because his brain, what is even happening...]

It suits you. Your bird.

[WHAT WITH THE SPARKLING AND ALL...]

[He pauses -- man all the gyms have been kind of weird so far.]

Just start at the beginning of the gyms, and go from there.

Oh hey, is that the pink duck-thing? It did the evolving thing, right?

[Master of scientific nomenclature, Dr Harleen Quinzel.]

It got real pretty.

Congrats on the evo dude. He looks pretty radical. [She gives him a thumbs up.]

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[ACTION]

[ACTION]

[Action]

[Video]

[ALSO ACTION] all my morons are in Goldenrod, here have them all

action forever

[action]

[video]

A POSE OFF!