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MISSION 004 [SOUTHERN ROUTE 35 - ACTION/VIDEO]
[[GOOD MORNING, JOHTO! Should you be watching your video feed this fine day, or in the vicinity of the outskirts of Goldenrod City, you'll soon catch sight of Alex Louis Armstrong posing dramatically in front of the camera, shirtless. Of course.]]
I have a marvel for you all today! My beautiful Stein has evolved into his final form!
[[And suddenly, popping up in front of the camera is....
....a swan in a purple bra. A sparkly purple bra.]]
Witness the way the sunlight catches his glossy feathers! The way the light sparkles across his wings! Have you ever seen such a magnificent sight, Johto?!
[[As Armstrong speaks, the Swanna goes through a series of triumphant poses. And if one looks closely, they might even see some....pink sparkles near his eyes? Could he have learned the art of the Armstrong sparkle, passed down in the Major's family for generations?]]
My Pokemon are now all in their final forms! And so I pose this question to you, noble viewers; what Gyms do you recommend we take on? We have been training our bodies firmly and dutifully in preparation for this day!
[[And behind him, Armstrong's team of Pokemon sit quietly, mostly looking amused at his display. Some look annoyed, but more at the Swanna's posing rather than their trainer.]]
Alternatively, should you wish to come and marvel at the sight that is the magnificent and beautiful Stein the Swanna, I welcome you all with open arms!
I have a marvel for you all today! My beautiful Stein has evolved into his final form!
[[And suddenly, popping up in front of the camera is....
....a swan in a purple bra. A sparkly purple bra.]]
Witness the way the sunlight catches his glossy feathers! The way the light sparkles across his wings! Have you ever seen such a magnificent sight, Johto?!
[[As Armstrong speaks, the Swanna goes through a series of triumphant poses. And if one looks closely, they might even see some....pink sparkles near his eyes? Could he have learned the art of the Armstrong sparkle, passed down in the Major's family for generations?]]
My Pokemon are now all in their final forms! And so I pose this question to you, noble viewers; what Gyms do you recommend we take on? We have been training our bodies firmly and dutifully in preparation for this day!
[[And behind him, Armstrong's team of Pokemon sit quietly, mostly looking amused at his display. Some look annoyed, but more at the Swanna's posing rather than their trainer.]]
Alternatively, should you wish to come and marvel at the sight that is the magnificent and beautiful Stein the Swanna, I welcome you all with open arms!
THE MOST MASCULINE POSE-OFF IN EXISTANCE!
A CHALLENGER APPEARS]]
I believe I may have to challenge that claim, good sir!
[[....
POSE]]
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[...Sparkly. Johnny is awestruck for a split-second.... but he's not going to go down that easy. He'll throw a comb up in the air, do a series of poses and catch it, running it through his hair.]
HAH! HUH!
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IS THIS FINALLY A WORTHY CHALLENGER....!!]]
Your skill is impressive, but you haven't gotten me yet!
[[TIME FOR A BULK UP
WITH
SPARKLES!!]]
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I won't be bested by some pretty vampire sparkles!
HAH! HUH! HUH HAH!
[Yeah, he's trying to bounce the comb between his pecs now.]
Can you do THIS, big guy?
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Well, that is impressive! But!! You will not defeat Alex Louis Armstrong with cheap tricks!!
[[BULKING....MUSCLES....TO MAXIMUM!!
LET US BOND THROUGH OUR BEAUTIFUL PHYSIQUES!!]]
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Ladies, you may want to take a number. Mine.
[Johnny continues with Flex-a-thon 2012: Live From Johto.]
I never thought I'd say this, big guy, but you're almost as pretty as me. I don't think people would be able to tell us apart if you had my hair and I had your moustache.
[He's straining now, but he continues trying to out-flex Armstrong. There's a Machop in the background, and his face is buried deep within its palm.]
Hah. Little guy's jealous... I think...